Where’s Ed? He was here just a minute ago!

In case you haven’t heard, the Democratic US Congress has been trying everything they can think of to pass a bill that stipulates a deadline for withdrawal of U.S. troops from Iraq. President Bush doesn’t like this idea very much. I’m not sure I do either but W and I are probably not on the same wavelength.

I don’t think we should be in Iraq at all but since W and his cronies have us there it seems to me that it might be irresponsible to pull out and let the puppet Iraqi government collapse. I’m really conflicted about this. Should we try to salvage the mess that Iraq has become at the expense of the lives of more service people? I just don’t know and I’m damn glad it isn’t up to me.

One person it is partially up to is Senator Mark Pryor (D-AK) who has a plan. Senator Pryor feels that the problem Mr. President has with a withdrawal date is that everyone will know about it. Now, if we had a secret withdrawal date, that would be OK, right? W loves secrets!

Senator Pryor’s plan is that Congress pass a bill that contains a withdrawal date but that they make the date a secret. That way all the evil doers in Iraq can’t make any plans and will have to just continue killing Americans as usual.

You see, according to Senator Pryor the only people who would actually know the secret withdrawal date would be:

  • Every one in Congress
  • Every one at the White House
  • Every one in the Iraqi government
  • Michael Moore and his immediate family

Ok, I made that last one up. Still you can see that with only the few thousand people listed involved there would be almost no chance of a leak! Can’t you just see it now, one morning in Baghdad:

Abdul: Mohammad, where did the Americans go?
Mohammad: I do not know, they were here just a minute ago.
Abdul: Who are we going to kill now?
Mohammad: I do not know, let’s go back to bed.

It’s pretty clear that a secret withdrawal would throw the insurgents into a tail spin. It would likely be a week or more before they overthrew the Iraqi government.

I explained this secret withdrawal plan to my parrot Dorian but all he said was, “Stoooopid“. Not sure if he meant Senator Pryor or me. I just couldn’t get Dorian to understand the real issue here: If we withdraw from Iraq, secretly or not, what will happen to Halliburton profits? Probably didn’t think of that, did ya Pryor?

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One Response to Where’s Ed? He was here just a minute ago!

  1. icedmocha says:

    Bwahahahaha. I am dying over the Abdul/Mohammad dialogue. Very nice. đŸ˜€

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